If you dont like anything that is said then dont read it simple as that

Friday, November 12, 2010

dont try and insinuate i dont fucking understand when i understand more then you give me credit for

Most people dont know this hell even my dad dosent i suffer anxiety and depression

based on the definition you posted

loss of interest in activities that were once interesting or enjoyable - yep i get that quite often
 loss of appetite with weight loss or overeating with weight gain - i find that i occasionally cant help but eat or simply dont feel hungry
 loss of emotional expression (flat affect)
a persistently sad, anxious or empty mood- get that
 feelings of hopelessness - quite often feel that
 pessimism
 guilt - yep get that too
  worthlessness, or helplessness - yep one thing i've felt a lot
social withdrawal- yes but its not as often as the rest considering my depression generally starts with being ditched
unusual fatigue, low energy level, a feeling of being slowed down - i actualy get that one quite offten as well
sleep disturbance with insomnia, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping; trouble concentrating, remembering, or making decisions - lets include the fact that i quite offten get dreams of death with that
; unusual restlessness or irritability; - the reason i get upset so easily
persistent physical problems such as headaches, digestive disorders, or chronic pain that do not respond to treatment - i do tend to get dreadfull headaches that even a panadol cant kill
; thoughts of death or suicide or suicide attempts - again i quite often get dreams of death

in 2007 i was diagnosed with anxiety

emotional symptoms of anxiety

  • Feelings of apprehension or dread
  • Trouble concentrating
  • Feeling tense and jumpy
  • Anticipating the worst
  • Irritability
  • Restlessness
  • Watching for signs of danger
  • Feeling like your mind’s gone blank
physical symptoms

  • Pounding heart
  • Sweating
  • Stomach upset or dizziness
  • Frequent urination or diarrhea
  • Shortness of breath
  • Tremors and twitches
  • Muscle tension
  • Headaches
  • Fatigue
  • Insomnia

and now for some things i live with in my life
My dad has cancer and is losing his eyesite his dr says in the next year it could be completely gone he will most likely never see me get married or have children of my own

in 2005 on the first of january my parents broke up and i got stuck between all the arguing

back in 2006 my dad and i lost everything when we were in cyclone larry and my mother threw everything we had in a trailer out in the rain.

in 2007 two days before my 17th birthday my dad our housemate my sisters ex one of my friends and me were all almost killed when we hit a cow which left me getting little sleep for months cos everytime i closed my eyes i could see the cow comming at the window

in march that year my dads best friend and one of the people who i always called my uncle died for weeks after that i couldnt sleep without having to have my light on and i dont like being alone outside in the dark

starting in 2008/09 i begain having bad dreams about everyone i love getting baddly hurt or dieing and around the same time my step brothers brother died in a car crash so now i will never get to meet him

2010 i'm starting to come out of my shell abit i found myself becoming less socially awkward but then my friends started having less time and not wanting to spend time with me, everytime i make plans they fall through

i understand a lot more then im givin credit for

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